1. 1. The more time you spend together, the more you like each other.
2. This is something you “feel”, not think.  There is nothing better than really liking another person.  The attraction to another is really about you; how much you like who you are when you are with this person.
3. 2. When angry or upset, never go for the jugular.

• Knowing another person’s secrets and vulnerabilities is an honor and must never be used against them.  There is nothing more hurtful than taking this privileged information and using it as a weapon. Unless you honor the depth of this communication, you can never have a strong relationship. 

1. You enjoy sex with your partner.

• Sex is not about having an itch and scratching it – it is about play, and the joy that comes from letting down your walls.  Being naked is a true metaphor for great sex; the openness that comes from taking off our costume and feeling comfortable in our nakedness.

1. You support one another’s interests, even if they’re different than your own.

• You have to really feel confident and loving to do this.  Do you need your partner to like the same things you like?  Supporting another’s interests comes from an open heart that understands the need to resonate to what is true for you, and not someone else.   

1. You don’t make the other person guess – You say what you need.

• Saying what you need is devoid of manipulation and the only way to have an authentic relationship. Sometimes it is not easy to speak up, but in the long run, it is always easier to bear the anxiety of shaking up the status quo than living with the  resentment and anger that comes with not getting what you want and need.

In a national competition, Chandra Alexander, MSW, was selected by THE OPRAH MAGAZINE as the Life Coach to deliver a series of coaching sessions to the grand prize winner of their prestigious Toyota Moving Forward contest. She also spent five years on NBC/TV “DAYTIME” giving a weekly “Reality Check”. Chandra has been living and teaching authenticity for the last 30 years and is the founder of Coaching for Authenticity, a place to explore and discover the essence of who you really are.