Upon reading my posts, you may have gathered that I am a highly motivated, goal-oriented person.  My friends and loved ones will attest to the contagiousness of my energy and enthusiastic spirit.  My positive attitude combined with strong ambition fuel my ability to accomplish my goals and dreams. 

This past weekend, my family and I went to my nephew’s 2^nd birthday party.  An old friend of my SIL’s also attended the party.  She has been training for triathlons some time and I was excited to pick her brain about our shared interest in the sport. 

I proudly told her about my latest endeavors and she snidely remarks, “Those aren’t real triathlons.  If you aren’t swimming 2 miles and feel like you are going to die, then you’ve not done a real tri.” 

Talk about crushing someone’s spirit!  That’s like telling someone who runs 5K, “You’re not a real runner unless you run a marathon.” 

Even in my shock, I scripted a pretty decent rebuttal.  “I believe a triathlon is defined by completing 3 physical activities: swim, bike and run.  If we went around the room and polled everyone, I think you would find everyone’s response to include those three things.  And, yes, technically it is only a sprint, but it feels like a REAL triathlon to me.  And despite what you may think, I do feel like I am going to die during and after, but I love it!  It’s not about the distance for me, but the challenge and trying to compete against my own time.” 

With a stunned expression, she replied “Well, I compete against myself as well, but I don’t event like triathlons.” 

“Then, why do you even do them?” 

“I do them because my friends convinced me to do it, but I don’t like them.” 

“So, you caved to peer pressure?  Interesting.” 

The longer I spoke with her, the more my blood began to boil.  I realize I am no Hollie Kenney, but I do best and I am damn proud of what I do!  The other athletes I have met at the various races have been so supportive and encouraging.  My friends and family applaud my achievements and in turn, I celebrate their hard-work too.  Where did this chick come off? 

To avoid an ugly scene turning even uglier, I took a few deep cleansing breaths and escaped to the patio to discuss politics with my BIL.  Discussing Obama over a beer would make me feel better.

As seen on the TheMomEntrepreneur, a great site for information regarding working mothers, raising kids, and running your own business.

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A few weeks ago, I was driving home from a workout at the gym…by myself…which is rare. I was enjoying a strawberries and creme Frappuccino and listening to 70s music on satellite radio; Boston, Sweet, LedZeppelin, Aerosmith, Rufus and many more. It was a great ride.

“My favorite “me time” is when I grab my camera and head outdoors to take photos of the surrounding landscape. Just being able to step back from life for a few moments and really appreciate the beauty all around is very soothing to me. I also like to indulge myself with a good romance novel that has a humorous twist to it and listen to 80’s music.”
–Julie Northrop, FreeBirthdayTreats.com, www.freebirthdaytreats.com

“Me time for me (during the winter months) is getting on my snowmobile and riding! I live just off the trails and love to jump on and go! I actually don’t even mind taking the kids, but I ride differently without them. It’s more of a leisurely ride when the kids are with us. But when they’re not, it’s more of a workout and challenging!”
–Michelle Pratt-Lienhart, Just Be Products LLC, www.jb-justbe.com/

“Every Sunday night, after I put my daughter to bed, I meet up with a girl friend to work-out. Sometimes we head over to the fitness center; sometimes we go for a jog. It’s a great way to start the week. I also spend about 20 minutes before bed reading a magazine or book.”

“After the birth of my second child, the most significant time I have for myself happens when I am reading. Breastfeeding lends itself to reading. You have one story that you can pick up and have that intellectual stimulation or escape that mothers need when most free time is spent with little ones. Watching a movie, TV, etc. is too frustrating because your private time is so fragmented with little ones.”
–Kate Dodson Strain, Belzer PC, www.belzerlaw.com/

“Me time for me is either spent having a pedicure with friends or grabbing a latte at Barnes & Nobel and sitting down to read a magazine for a few minutes of quiet time.”
–Jodi Van Lom, Playgroups USA, www.playgroupsusa.com/

“I love to be outside and enjoy the day (when it’s sunny and perfect weather, that is!) I love a good brisk walk while listening to my iPod. U2 always puts me in a GREAT mood…”
–Jessica Lewis, ToLiveBeautiful.com, www.tolivebeautiful.com/

“When I get some time to myself, I usually always try to fit a work out in. Even if it is 20 minutes at the gym, with no interruptions, it is great! The other favorite thing I do on my ‘me time’ is watch a favorite show that I have tivo’ed. At night when the house is quiet, if I have finished pending work items, I pour a glass a wine and catch up with Oprah, Dancing with the Stars, or Lost.”
–Jennifer Manriquez, The Bilingual Fun Co. LLC, www.bilingualfun.com/

“I find that if I really want true ‘me time’, I can’t be at home. If I’m home I’m in ‘mommy-mode’, and there will be no me time. So as often as I’m able, I take my 3rd baby (aka macbook) and head to Starbucks. I do my work, but it’s in a relaxed environment with no distractions (and a nice caramel macchiato). Does it count if I am working? The other thing I do is…shop! After the kids are in bed I sometimes head out to window shop. Often when I’ve been out on the town with the kids, I’ll see something I want to inspect closer, but of course can’t, because my son is generally screaming or whining. So, at night I can head back to the mall or the store and look at stuff in peace.”
–Holly Klaassen, Her SEO, www.HerSEO.com

“For me time, I read. I love a good novel. Being that I am on the road a lot, I look for opportunities to read. I will go to a local park, sit under a tree and read for 20 minutes or so. It really clears my head.”

“We have a set “siesta” time each day, the kids don’t have to nap, but it’s chill/alone time for all of us for at least an hour every day. I’ll take this time to catch up on emails/connections with friends, to watch the news, etc. A lot of time, I’ll do some of the writing or designing aspects of the job because I truly enjoy this. I also get up and out and walk the dogs every morning before the hustle and bustle of the day. Meditating is another big one for me. The bookstore is another way I enjoy alone time - skimming magazines, looking at which cool notebook I want next, what new novels are out.”

How do you spend your “me-time”?

When you become a mother, you want to spend all your time with your precious newborn. Being the guiding force in your baby’s life is the most important thing! That’s why work at home moms are so happy with their jobs – working at home allows you to spend plenty of time with your children while still contributing to the household income.

Often mothers are expected or encouraged to go back to work as soon as the baby is old enough to be left with a babysitter or daycare. Some companies only allow six weeks of maternity leave, and that means you have, at the most, six weeks with your newborn child. Many mothers are rebelling against that old expectation and are working at home instead.

Being a work at home mom means you have more time for your family. If your child gets sick, you don’t have to take time off work and juggle appointments to take them to the doctor – you are home already, so you can do whatever your chosen business is, all the while holding your sick child close to you. If you need to make a run to the doctor, no problem! You set your own hours when you work at home, so you can shuffle your schedule to keep your child the priority.

Setting your own schedule can be a wonderful thing, as long as you’re organized enough to make it work! Being a work at home mom is not as easy as others might think it is. You have to be your own secretary, manager and accountant. You are handling not only the duties of a full-time parent, but also those of a full-time business owner. That’s a heavy load to carry!

But it’s worth it when you take a break from the work you love and look down to see your lovely little child smiling up at you, happy and content in the knowledge that you are there for them, all the time, no matter what. That’s a feeling that makes all the hard work seem easy, and makes you thankful that you took the steps to become a work at home mom.

Denise Bergeron

The goal of SingleMomFinancialHelp.com is to help women change the world through information and education. We are creating a support structure through which all women of the world can educate one another about where they have been, where they are right now and where they are going. With help from our site and the information and articles we distribute women will be more educated in finance, business, home matters, relationships, career and higher education.

Money—it’s such a simple, yet potent word that can invoke many different emotions, thoughts, fears and dreams in so many people. We all seem to want it, but most of us for different reasons. For some it’s the means to a better life or survival, for others it’s about power, control, vanity….or simply having things.

I’ve never given much thought to the meaning behind it all—the meaning of money, until I stumbled upon “The Ultimate Gift”. This inspiring movie, based on the book with the same name (by Jim Stovall), reminded me of how easily money can corrupt our perspectives about what’s important, and what is real.

Why do we work as hard as we do? What does all this money do for us? What is it all for?

Ironically, my entire professional life is centered on money, taking care of it for others, making sure that it’s saved, it grows, that it lasts, and that it protects the people that have entrusted me with it, people that have worked so hard for it and others who maybe didn’t. I live and breathe money every day—in my client planning, their investments, savings, budgeting…..money…..it’s everywhere…. in its tangible form. But, what exactly does money mean?

What exactly does money mean to you?

Money is blind, and money blinds. It is a ticket to freedom, for others a sentence in darkness. Some obsess about it, a few loathe it, and yet others cannot ever seem to attract it. I’ve seen money corrupt the most decent of people, rip families apart and poison minds and hearts. But, I’ve also seen money enable dreams, save lives and nourish the existence of those who need it most. Money is meant to be shared, not hoarded, help not hurt.

Every day, we should remind ourselves of our purpose in life, revisit our dreams and face our deepest fears. Life is a journey, it’s our shared existence and every experience, good or bad, painful or happy teaches us something. Every moment is really, an ultimate gift….and money, no matter how much or how little we may have, is merely the means to end–nothing more.

Cathy Pareto, MBA, CFP®, AIF® is the Founder and President of Cathy Pareto & Associates, Inc. For over twelve years, Cathy has been helping financial consumers and professionals understand the world of investments and finance with a sound, but down to earth money management approach. For over a decade Cathy was a Senior Financial Advisor for another Miami based investment advisory firm, where she managed over $200 million in assets for high net worth clients and retirement plans. She has extensive experience in retirement issues, asset allocation, investment selection, investment management, education planning, estate planning coordination, and asset protection strategies. Additionally, she was an Adjunct Professor and Faculty Coordinator for the CFP® Program at Florida International University’s College of Business.

It’s a problem for all parents. You have 1000 things to accomplish in the day including a 9am meeting with a potential client. In order to make it to the meeting on time you need the morning routine to go like clockwork. Unfortunately, your children don’t have the same sense of urgency that you do, and refuse to get dressed. What should you do? Here are 3 tips from various bloggers, to help you get your children out of the house on time every morning.

Kathy Slattengren of Pricelessparenting believes that the child needs to see the benefit of getting ready for school on time. She writes: ” In order for her son to be self-motivated to get dressed quickly in the morning, he needed to see a benefit in doing so. The benefit could be eating breakfast, being able to dress at home instead of at preschool or having time for a story. Whatever the benefit, mom should let him know ahead of time and then follow through on it. Mom could say “Please join me for breakfast just as soon as you are dressed. Breakfast will be served until 7:30.” If he gets dressed quickly, he’ll have time for breakfast. However, if he’s slow then he’s likely to miss the 7:30 time frame and also breakfast. Mom can definitely expect an uproar if he misses breakfast. She might be comforted in knowing that he will not starve and he will probably change his behavior so as not to miss breakfast in the future. ”

Give a weekly reward is the advice from MommySavers. ” I try not to engage in a power struggle, just tell her that if she doesn’t want to get dressed she can go in her pjs or that she won’t get her reward on Fri if she doesn’t get moving. She gets a reward on Friday for not getting any reports home from school all week and I have added getting out the door without tantrums/fights. We having been making it out w/out fights, but we are still rushing (which she doesn’t like and gets grumpy) or late (which I don’t like and I get grumpy). Looking for suggestions so we are happier ppl in the morn!”

Prepare the night before is the lesson from Karaskids. Summarizing her success in getting her kids off to Sunday school she writes, ” I know what you are thinking…it sounds like chaos, and with a little planning it could run smoother. Did I mention that I am a major procrastinator??? Getting everything ready ahead of time really does not even cross my mind. But, this week was a little different. I decided to shower the night before. I also got the lesson printed off and everything ready. I laid out the boys clothes. This morning ran fairly smoothly. Todd took over as usual for breakfast. While everyone was eating I got myself dressed and ready. Then, I ate my breakfast and had the boys dress themselves. I dressed McKenna and did her hair. Todd was ready and we were out the door on time.”

If you have a tip you’d like to share with other BizzyWomen on how to make mornings less stressful, post a comment for all our readers to see.

Recently, cnn.com/living reported that a growing number of women are choosing to leave the workforce to become stay-at-home wives.  Good choice, ladies!  I applaud your decision and raise my margarita glass to you! 

In the 1960s, our mothers and grandmothers fought for our right to choose a career path fitting to our needs and free from the constraints of society’s expectations or demands.  Almost fifty years later, we can choose to stay home to maintain a happy home and raise a family without shame, criticism or question.  Even though the pay stinks and vacation time and sick days are an absurd notion, many of us refuse to hang up our aprons any time soon.  

As the article reports, some women have the option to stay at home with their decision having little or no financial impact.  As in my case, my husband’s salary covers all of our household expenses and I feel fortunate to have the opportunity and choice to be a stay-at-home mom  Domestic Diva.

Even once my children are in school full-time, I have no desire to return to teaching, but my professional skills are by no means “wasted” as I apply those skills in all aspects of my life as a stay-at-home mom.  The skills acquired during my teaching career are utilized when managing my moms group and raising my children.   Essentially, I teach children all day long.  I also dust off my teaching tools on days that I volunteer at my daughter’s school.

Even the women in my moms group tap into their professional skills as SAHM.  In her former life as an administrative assistant, Erika adopted the most amazing organizational skills.  Those skills play into her stay-at-home career as she generates and maintains filing systems for every project in her life.  Perhaps, if Erika does not return to work, she should offer how-to organizational work-shops in between pedicures and household chores.

However, stay-at-home wives have an advantage over stay-at-home moms.  A stay-at-home wife has the luxury to focus on her own needs and personal goals, whereas stay-at-home moms often find it difficult to put their needs first.  The needs of a stay-at-home mom often fall behind the needs of her children and her husband, and therefore her personal goals are put on hold.   

When choosing to trade your paycheck for an apron, there are two important points to consider: lack of income and lack of adult interaction.  While in the workplace, you are accustomed to having frivolous spending money and a disposable income. Upon entering the world of domestic bliss, the absence of an income becomes a difficult adjustment.  One less paycheck means a lot less spending.  To help with your transition, plan a budget for fun money in your weekly or monthly budget, which excludes household bills, groceries and other expenses.

Unless you prefer solitude, staying at home can be a lonely choice for some.  Although work may have caused you some stress, there were co-workers to chat with and many opportunities for stimulating adult conversation. Therefore, to keep you sane and connect with other people, join an on-line social network to find others with similar interests, such as scrapbooking or an outdoor adventure group.  Also, search for local special interest happenings related to your hobbies.  An all night scrapbooking event or a book discussion at a local coffee shop can provide a means to satisfy your craving for adult interaction. 

As for me, working was over-rated.  Sure the money was a perk, but the stress out weighed the benefit for me.  I actually prefer a pile of poopy diapers over a pile of paperwork.  These days, I have achieved a work-life balance like none other.

Remember the 80’s smash, Vacation, from the Go-Go’s? As we are in the last half of August, most people I know are actually on vacation. The real question is with today’s email connectivity, whether they really are on vacation?

According to the Go-Go’s the point of a vacation is ” Vacation Had to get away Vacation Meant to be spent alone..” Unfortunately with email and mobile devices, we are virtually unable to be ‘left alone’.

I came across a great  blog by Rebecca Coggan where she quotes from a new AOL email usage study. She says, “ More than 50% said they check their email while on vacation. It’s even higher among mobile users. 78% of those who have a mobile device check email while on vacation.” She also writes, ” 28% said they feel obligated to check work email while on vacation, and 19% choose vacation spots with email access.”

That just sounds sick to me. I once had a job with a prominent Wall-Street bank and my boss told me that he was flying to the Himalayas for a 2 week vacation. I thought to myself, that this would mean that I’d get a bit of downtime at work and be able to spend some quality time with my family. Well much to my surprise within an hour of landing he sent me an email from his Blackberry. C’mon.

People need to understand that it’s okay not to be connected 24/7 as well as that the world will go on if you don’t answer an email.  If you are a business owner or a manager, you need to trust the employees that you hired, to be able to do the job while you are out of the office.

But maybe all is not lost. Ronda Muir writes on her lawpeopleblog that a law firm is urging employees to disconnect while on vacation. ” Linklaters is reported having decreed, in a fit of concern for work/life balance, that lawyers leave their Blackberrys at home while on holiday (vacation to us).The order is designed to insulate associates, in particular, from the relentless rat race for a few sweet weeks a year, according to management.”

Good for them Let’s hope that this becomes a trend.

Aaron Katsman is Managing Editor of the Israel Opportunity Investor newsletter. He is lead portfolio manager for the Israel Growth Portfolio and Managing Director of America Israel Investment Associates, LLC. For more information, go to www.israelnewsletter.com or call 1-888-327-6179, or email aaron@profile-financial.com.