In many sales-oriented networking books and course, people are taught that networking is a selling tool and part of that lesson is what’s known as the Three Foot Rule: “Anyone within three feet of you is an opportunity to make a sale.”

We feel that not only is this bad advice for the networker, one that seriously decreases the chance for quality connection (many “3-Footers” mysteriously find themselves unable to get within three feet of anyone in a very short period of time), but that it also creates a negative feeling to the whole concept of networking in the minds of others.

As a result, people begin to avoid any event or activity labeled “networking” because they neither wish to participate in this hard-sell technique, nor do they wish to be exposed to it, especially in a concentrated form, in doing so we all lose out on valuable opportunities for service, connection and growth.

So, in the true spirit of connection-based networking (adding value to interactions in order to create and strengthen our connections with others), we hereby present our own Three Foot Rule, and hope you’ll join us in finding ways to make it our mission for the future of networking:

“Every person within three feet of you is an opportunity to serve.”   Dr. Ivan R Misner

Hazel M Walker, owns three award winning franchise’s. She is a 10 year owner of two BNI Franchises where she teaches members how to leverage their time and network to build each others businesses. She is also a Referral Institute franchise owner and teaches Business Owners how to harness the Science of Referrals to develop Referrals for Life. Hazel is a published author in New York Times best sellers Masters of Networking and Masters of Sales. As a member of the National Speakers Association she travels the world speaking to businesses and women’s organizations on the topics of networking to create a life you love.

Book Review – Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office by Lois P Frankel, PhD

By: Amy Franko

As women entrepreneurs, mompreneurs, business owners, and professionals, there are certain behaviors we have been socialized to engage in that can sabotage our success.

Women have typically been socialized to:

• Avoid conflict
• Be polite and soft-spoken
• Be relationship oriented
• Avoid assertive behavior
• Put the needs of others before our own
• Behave like girls!

Lois Frankel, author of Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office, outlines 101 of the biggest mistakes women unconsciously make that hurt their credibility, career advancement, and businesses. I’m a huge fan of this book, and wish I had it when I started my first job! Today, as an entrepreneur, these concepts are still valuable in my relationships with clients, colleagues, and business partners.

To make the most of the book’s format and tips, the opening self-assessment pinpoints your top areas to address. From there, the book is organized into eight chapters that serve as a coaching guide. It’s easy to move around within the book, work on those mistakes that are affecting you most, and refer back to it later.

Three of my favorite areas that Dr. Frankel addresses:

How you sound. How you sound accounts for almost 40% of your credibility. People quickly make decisions about you and whether or not they want to continue listening to your message. The word choices you make, how you organize and express our thoughts, and the tone of voice you use all contribute to that decision-making process. The book points out key mistakes and their fixes, such as apologizing unnecessarily, over-explaining, using fillers and non-words, and not using the language of business.

How you brand and market yourself. Regardless of whether you are a business owner or corporate professional, you are your brand. It’s your responsibility to distinguish yourself from the field, promoting who you are in a way that’s positive and reflects your integrity. Dr. Frankel points out the mistakes that put your success in jeopardy, such as failing to define your unique value, passing up high-profile assignments, or waiting to be noticed.

How you respond. This section refers to negative messages and behaviors women have been socialized to accept. Often we internalize messages from childhood that later impact our self-esteem and how we see the world. We sometimes believe we aren’t good enough or that others know more than we do. The book offers specific ways to identify and overcome these sabotaging behaviors.

I encourage you to add this book to your library – it’s a practical, well-organized, and relevant resource you’ll use often on your journey to success! For additional information and tips from the author, visit Dr. Frankel’s website.

About the Author:

Amy Franko is the owner and principal learning designer of Amy Franko Consulting. Amy is a certified Book Yourself Solid ™ business coach. The group she’s most passionate about serving is women who are solo service professionals. She uses a simple system of protocols specifically designed to help them get out into the world and bring more ideal clients into their business, even if marketing and selling isn’t something they like to do!

You can learn more about her by visiting her LinkedIn profile or following her on Twitter.

As “The Career Makeover Coach”, Tai Goodwin is on a mission to help ambitious individuals reinvent their professional lives by centering on their passion and purpose. Holding as a core belief that we are all called to divine purpose and gifted with a unique passion, Tai uses a results driven, spiritually grounded approach to help clients create career paths to support the lifestyle they desire. Whether it’s helping people go from embittered to empowered professionals or making the transition from employee to entrepreneur, Tai is committed to helping clients tap into their own potential for brilliance. Tai has been empowering others through teaching and coaching for over 14 years. A gifted and insightful communicator, Tai holds a Bachelor of Science in Elementary Education from Drexel University and a Master of Science in Education from Capella University. She has completed ASTD’s (American Society for Training and Development) Coaching Certificate program and is pursuing professional coaching certification through the International Coach Academy. Originally from Philadelphia, Tai currently lives in Delaware with her daughter. She is currently working on her first book: Reclaiming Your Brilliance: Seven Ways to Take Your Life from Bright to Brilliant.

Web site: http://www.careermakeovercoach.com

I was on a teleconference today with some very bright business owners, and the message I heard loud and clear was that marketing can really suck. As in – suck you dry. But also, of course, it can be an awfully unpleasant thing (that you keep procrastinating) on your to-do list.

I personally have encountered marketing becoming a daunting and unpleasant activity, but I can also say that it doesn’t have to be that way. Here are three things you can do to improve how you feel about your marketing:

1. Remember that it’s like exercise – it’s critical that you do it, but sometimes it takes about 10 minutes to “warm up,” but, even still, you might be counting the minutes until it’s finished.

2. Remember that what feels like “rejection” or “being ignored” isn’t personal. It’s not about you – it’s really about the person you’re trying to reach not thinking they need what you’re marketing right now. Regroup and try again.

3. Remember that the marketing activities with the greatest impact are not the expensive ones. Remember what I said about exercise? Well, a lot of us try to motivate ourselves to exercise by spending a lot of money on fancy outfits and tools. In the end, you could put on a decent pair of shoes and just go for a walk. Marketing is the same way. Just get out and do it – you don’t need a lot of money to succeed!

Virginia Ginsburg is an entrepreneur and business & marketing consultant who delivers strategic, affordable marketing services through her company accordionmarketing. She also writes a blog called Body > Mind > Business, which discuses the connection between business health and personal health, and the struggles she faces in pursuit of work-life balance. Virginia has an MBA from the University of Southern California and is currently (slowly) pursuing a Ph.D. in Psychology at UCLA. She has more than 12 years of experience as a senior marketing consultant, and has served as a trusted partner, coach and consultant to more than 100 sole proprietors, partnerships and corporations. 
Virginia lives in Santa Monica, CA with her husband and daughter. As part of her passion for working with entrepreneurs, Virginia is actively involved in small business development projects in the U.S. and in developing countries.

Aristotle said, “We are what we repeatedly do.  Excellence,then, is not an act, but a habit.

So, let me ask, what habits have you created around your referrals business?

The first habit that every business person should have is the habit of tracking your activities.  Creating a referral system requires that you track several things.

Track your networking activities.

• Who are you networking with?
• What activities are you participating in?

Track your giving.

• Who have you given business to?
• What connections have you been able to make?
• What was the value of the business you have given?

Track your receiving.

• Who has referred business to you?
• Who has connected you?
• What was the value of the business you received?

Track your thanking activities.

• Who have you thanked
• How have you thanked them?

When you have a system for tracking your activities and you use it consistently you begin to develop a habit.  It is these habits that creates excellence!

Hazel M Walker, owns three award winning franchise’s. She is a 10 year owner of two BNI Franchises where she teaches members how to leverage their time and network to build each others businesses. She is also a Referral Institute franchise owner and teaches Business Owners how to harness the Science of Referrals to develop Referrals for Life. Hazel is a published author in New York Times best sellers Masters of Networking and Masters of Sales. As a member of the National Speakers Association she travels the world speaking to businesses and women’s organizations on the topics of networking to create a life you love.

Have you taken a look at the goals you set for your business?  More precisely have you reviewed your referral goals?

Most people don’t set goals, at least not in writing. I would encourage you to take this time to write down what you expect to achieve for the second half of the year. 

For those of you who did take the time to set your goals at the beginning of the year, now is a time to take a hard look at those goals and ask yourself, based on your current activities;

1.  Are you on track to achieve those goals?
2.  Were they realistic referral goals?
3.  Have you identified and developed your Referral Partners?
4.  Have you shared your goals with your Referral Partners?
5.  Do you need more help?
6.  Who can help you & when will you ask them?

For most of us, staying on task and focused on our goals requires a little extra help.  If you are behind ask for help, find an accountability partner, get a referral coach, and get your Referral Partners trained so you can help each other.

Hazel M Walker, owns three award winning franchise’s. She is a 10 year owner of two BNI Franchises where she teaches members how to leverage their time and network to build each others businesses. She is also a Referral Institute franchise owner and teaches Business Owners how to harness the Science of Referrals to develop Referrals for Life. Hazel is a published author in New York Times best sellers Masters of Networking and Masters of Sales. As a member of the National Speakers Association she travels the world speaking to businesses and women’s organizations on the topics of networking to create a life you love.

My friend Paula Frazier is my guest blogger.  Paula is an excellent trainer for the Referral Institute.

“Why do you do what you do?” Great question! People buy for emotional reasons, it isn’t about products and services or features versus functions. It’s about YOU and what keeps you excited about the business you’re building. It’s your story, your most unique selling position. Like snowflakes each person’s story is different and beautiful in its own way. Each one is unique.

• What is your company mission? Your personal mission? How are they in alignment?
• What segment of your business gives you the most pleasure and the most profit?
• Are you seen as the vendor of choice? Why do people seek you out?
• How did you get started in your industry?
• What excites you about what you do?

Of all the people who do what you do, why you? Your story is one of the very few things that can truly separate you from your competition. What’s your story? How do you tell it? It’s what sets you apart from everyone else who does what you do.

Hazel M Walker, owns three award winning franchise’s. She is a 10 year owner of two BNI Franchises where she teaches members how to leverage their time and network to build each others businesses. She is also a Referral Institute franchise owner and teaches Business Owners how to harness the Science of Referrals to develop Referrals for Life. Hazel is a published author in New York Times best sellers Masters of Networking and Masters of Sales. As a member of the National Speakers Association she travels the world speaking to businesses and women’s organizations on the topics of networking to create a life you love.

There is no place where it is more important to show gratitude than in your referral marketing activities. Letting people know that you appreciate what they have done for you makes it easier for that person to refer you again.

I find that women are so much better at thanking others for helping them than men are. Why is that? A hand written note or a small token of appreciation, hands down women are most effective at showing appreciation.

So, the rest of this article is for the men. Say thank you to the people who refer you, thank those who connect you to the people you want to be connected to. Systems like Sendoutcards make it easy for you say thanks. You can create a card, add a little gift if you want and send it out, all online. It takes all of 10 minutes, but the return is 10 fold. If you don’t want to use Sendoutcards come up with a system of your own, make it a habit.

People want to be thanked, people want to be appreciated, when you take the time to let people know how much you appreciate them, you will win over and over again.

Hazel M Walker, owns three award winning franchise’s. She is a 10 year owner of two BNI Franchises where she teaches members how to leverage their time and network to build each others businesses. She is also a Referral Institute franchise owner and teaches Business Owners how to harness the Science of Referrals to develop Referrals for Life. Hazel is a published author in New York Times best sellers Masters of Networking and Masters of Sales. As a member of the National Speakers Association she travels the world speaking to businesses and women’s organizations on the topics of networking to create a life you love.

When I was a teen I would spend a lot of time with my grandparents.  My grandfather owned his own business, JR Custom Floors and I learned a lot from he and my grandmother as they ran that business.  Today as I was putting some dates and times on my calendar for some local “Tweetups”   I was brought back to a time when my grandparents did much the same thing with thei coffee meets.

My grandfather belonged to a club, it was called the “Metro CBers”.   You know, those guys who had two way radios known as Citizen Band Radios and they talked to each other all the time.  There were many a night when my grandfather would be on the Radio until 1:00am in the morning talking to his friends.   They talked about everything on those radios and they all had “handles”  like “Floorshine”, “Qupiedoll”, “Bigbelly” and so forth.  Once a month they would meetup and have coffee, introduce each other, welcome the new CBers and handout their CB Cards with their handles on it.  It was a lot of fun and I always looked forward to going with my grandparents.  I did not know then that I was actually learning to network and those lessons would follow me into adulthood when I would start using a tool called “Twitter”

Oddly, the more things change, the more they stay the same!  Oh, and my grandmother reminds me, that I was “Qupiedoll”.  The handle that my grandfather gave me!

Hazel M Walker, owns three award winning franchise’s. She is a 10 year owner of two BNI Franchises where she teaches members how to leverage their time and network to build each others businesses. She is also a Referral Institute franchise owner and teaches Business Owners how to harness the Science of Referrals to develop Referrals for Life. Hazel is a published author in New York Times best sellers Masters of Networking and Masters of Sales. As a member of the National Speakers Association she travels the world speaking to businesses and women’s organizations on the topics of networking to create a life you love.

Business people spend a lot of time networking, some times it is important to slow down and develop relationships with the people that you have added to your network.  In the book “The 29% Solution” by Dr. Ivan R Misner and Michelle Donovan, they discuss tactics for building better relationships with your network members.  The more we get to know our network members the more credibility we build with them.

My son is very interested in playing golf.  He plays regularly, even in the winter when others are setting at home in the warmth.  He has a great game, plays daily, and spends time practicing.  He loves the game and has a keen interest in becoming better.

On the other hand, there is Tiger Woods.  Tiger is committed to playing golf.  He spends money and time to improve his game every single day.  He strives to learn something new to improve his game.  He knows that he is one of the best in the world and he knows that he can always learn more.  He has coaches that hold him accountable while he spends time and money improving his game.  That is commitment.

So are you interested in growing your business by referral, or are you committed?  

Common traits of those committed to a business by referral:

• They regularly take the time to learn more about referrals
• They practice what they learn
• They have accountability coaches or partners
• They implement systems in their business
• They never make the assumption that they already know
• They seek others who are working to do the same

Experts are committed to what they are doing, while amateurs are merely interested. Which are you? 

Hazel M Walker, owns three award winning franchise’s. She is a 10 year owner of two BNI Franchises where she teaches members how to leverage their time and network to build each others businesses. She is also a Referral Institute franchise owner and teaches Business Owners how to harness the Science of Referrals to develop Referrals for Life. Hazel is a published author in New York Times best sellers Masters of Networking and Masters of Sales. As a member of the National Speakers Association she travels the world speaking to businesses and women’s organizations on the topics of networking to create a life you love.