For creativity, you need to get rid of the crap. Your surroundings are a reflection of who you are, and the state of your environment is a reflection of the state of your mind.

I work best when everything is in its proper place. At this point, I should make a disclaimer. Everyone works differently. You might work well in crap. I cannot. The piles and dust and general disorder weigh on my mind. Like a big stinky dump truck with tin cans tied to the bumper that clang against the sides of my brain. No, I do not work well with disorder.

Chaos and confusion within your to-do list will also make a mess of your mind. You must do the thing you think you cannot do. Get it out of the way. Right now.

For me, it’s tough to deal with accounting-related tasks. Not only because I am so clearly a right-brained person, but because I’m also directly responsible for my own salary. It’s incredibly stressful. So I sub-consciously avoid the numbers game because it’s difficult and hard and sticky.

But it’s also incredibly important, so I push it to the forefront daily. After all, the show cannot go on without money, and I really love that thing called eating. So while I would really prefer to be brainstorming the next big idea, finishing the accounting makes me feel just as good, euphoric even.

Purging your to-do list of items that bring you anxiety means not only crossing off the difficult and boring tasks, but getting rid of the items that suck your energy.

For instance, I have a habit of adding unnecessary to-dos to my list. Items that are so ridiculously broad such as “recruitment,” or so entrenched in abbreviation like “LM to SC and in DB & Ltr” that I have no frickin’ clue what I’m supposed to be doing or where to start. Such items are now banned from my college-lined notebook. Don’t let them show up in yours. Sneaky rascals, those to-dos.

It’s kind of like the style shows where they embarrass people into dressing properly. The fashionable teach the outdated, passé, and defunct how to rid their closet of negative energy and bedazzaled Capri jeans. By doing so they make the simple act of getting dressed a retreat of confidence, coolness and beauty.

Now, just think if your to-do list were that sexy.

Face your work woes. Creativity will follow the work that you do and the risks you take.

Work woe no more.

“Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.” -Benjamin Spock

I’ve witnessed and been involved in situations where personal power is traded for acceptance and peace at any cost. Life coaching clients, family, friends and yours truly,  can find ourselves in situations where we relinquish our personal power and over-empower others.

If you are a highly sensitive creature like I am,  these encounters can bring forward feelings of sadness, betrayal and confusion.

Recently I was involved in a conversation about subject matter I knew very little about. Upon spelunking into the conversation, to share an example of my rudimentary understanding, I was pounced on and treated like a fool.  It never occurred to me I would be attacked for sharing my point of view.  The exchange was unsettling because I am strong, intelligent and creative.  Instead of saying Shove Off,  I let myself slide into a place of insecurity.

I gave my power to a person who was in the mood to behave badly.

The next day my husband and I discussed the scene and he counseled me to shrug off the encounter.  Then, my brilliant husband asked me why I’d given my power away?

Great question from the all knowing and loving oracle!

In this particular instance,  I knew I was out gray mattered by a person who spent years interested in areas of study I had only just begin to think about. BUT, I thought it was safe to climb in, share and explore.  When the terrain became to challenging,  I tried to explain my position, eventually lost my footing and slipped away into a sink hole.

This encounter led me to dive deeper into the curious cave of personal power and trust.  Owning your power is an integral part of personal happiness, fulfilling connections and achieving your potential.  You give your power away when you make someone outside of you more important than what you hold inside of you.

You give away your power when you …

* Doubt yourself.
* Try to make everyone happy.
* Over-empower others by looking for approval and validation, giving them the power to hurt you.
* Forget that you know what you’re doing, and you are good at it.
* Have poor boundaries.
* Allow yourself to be intimidated by bluster and emotional assaults from other people.
* Don’t honor and share your truth.

You keep your power when  you …

* Learn to say “No” and mean it.
* Stand up for yourself and believe in yourself, no matter what.
* Stand on the courage of your convictions.
* Ask for what you need and want.
* Embrace the fact you have the right be treated respectfully by other people.
* Be detached and practice detachment by observing other people’s behavior without attachment to the outcome.
* Spend time with people who are kind and considerate in the midst of a spirited discussion.

Owning your power means speaking your truth, honoring your sensitivity, and believing in yourself. Your life experience, education, personal relationships, and curiosity make you wise.  Always believe in yourself and if need be, tell the bullies to shove off!

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” Buddha

 

Shann Vander Leek is the Founder of True Balance Life Coaching and Co-founder of Seize True Success. She is a Coach Training Alliance certified professional coach, and certified yoga instructor. Shann is a prolific blogger, published writer and co-author of the Best Selling Book – Wake Up Women BE Happy Healthy & Wealthy. Shann’s personal style and direct approach have guided and inspired many in overcoming personal and professional challenges. Her background in sales, marketing and client development, along with leading a talented sales force for many years prepared her for the business of professional coaching. Shann inspires women in transition to create balance in their lives through personal coaching, yoga and creative expression. Telephone and email consultations make her accessible to clients all over the world. To find out about her Coaching Programs for Women, call Shann at 231.668.111 or visit www.truebalancelifecoaching.com

 

If you are not familiar with Eckhart Tolle (Read Interviews) you are missing an opportunity to learn from a great teacher.  Tolle’s teachings are about surrendering to “what is”, living in the present moment, and staying open to all of life.  The Power of Now is a must read for anyone on the path.  Going beyond the mind and into the heart, Tolle never misses. 

Tolle says, “With the concept of “relationship” come expectations, memories of past relationships, and further personally and culturally conditioned mental concepts of what a “relationship” should be like. Then I would try to make reality conform to these concepts. And it never does. And again I suffer. The fact of the matter is: there are no relationships. There is only the present moment, and in the moment there is only relating.

How we relate, or rather how well we love, depends on how empty we are of ideas, concepts, expectations.”

Dear Eckhart,
You often use phrases such as “true alignment with life” and “inner alignment with what is”. How can we ever be out of alignment with what is?  Surely what is is WHAT IS and must include confusion, resistance and non surrender to the present moment.

Dear Anonymous,
What you say is the truth.  As long as that truth is not recognized, however, there is suffering (which of course is part of what is.)  As soon as it is recognized, a new dimension arises: awareness, Presence.  This is the awakening, the shift, the transcendence of suffering.  So, when I say alignment with life I mean conscious alignment.  Non-surrender to the present moment is ultimately only non-recognition that you are already one with what is.  This is the illusion of separation (which, of course, also has its rightful place within the totality).  So we are all on a journey from unconscious to conscious alignment with life. 

In a national competition, Chandra Alexander, MSW, was selected by THE OPRAH MAGAZINE as the Life Coach to deliver a series of coaching sessions to the grand prize winner of their prestigious Toyota Moving Forward contest. She also spent five years on NBC/TV “DAYTIME” giving a weekly “Reality Check”. Chandra has been living and teaching authenticity for the last 30 years and is the founder of Coaching for Authenticity, a place to explore and discover the essence of who you really are.