In many sales-oriented networking books and course, people are taught that networking is a selling tool and part of that lesson is what’s known as the Three Foot Rule: “Anyone within three feet of you is an opportunity to make a sale.”

We feel that not only is this bad advice for the networker, one that seriously decreases the chance for quality connection (many “3-Footers” mysteriously find themselves unable to get within three feet of anyone in a very short period of time), but that it also creates a negative feeling to the whole concept of networking in the minds of others.

As a result, people begin to avoid any event or activity labeled “networking” because they neither wish to participate in this hard-sell technique, nor do they wish to be exposed to it, especially in a concentrated form, in doing so we all lose out on valuable opportunities for service, connection and growth.

So, in the true spirit of connection-based networking (adding value to interactions in order to create and strengthen our connections with others), we hereby present our own Three Foot Rule, and hope you’ll join us in finding ways to make it our mission for the future of networking:

“Every person within three feet of you is an opportunity to serve.”   Dr. Ivan R Misner

Hazel M Walker, owns three award winning franchise’s. She is a 10 year owner of two BNI Franchises where she teaches members how to leverage their time and network to build each others businesses. She is also a Referral Institute franchise owner and teaches Business Owners how to harness the Science of Referrals to develop Referrals for Life. Hazel is a published author in New York Times best sellers Masters of Networking and Masters of Sales. As a member of the National Speakers Association she travels the world speaking to businesses and women’s organizations on the topics of networking to create a life you love.

I spoke at a  luncheon recently about networking and one young lady posed an interesting question that I would like to take the time to address here.

“I know that I need to network, but can you tell me which groups would be a waste of time.”  I am sure there was more conversation around that question than I am posting here, but that was the gist of the question.

My response to her was, “All networking without a strategy is a waste of time. It is not a matter of the organization being a waste of time, it is the strategy that you use within the organization  that makes it effective.”

BNI is structured systems intended to create success for it’s members but many people will leave the organization saying “It” did not work for them.  An organization cannot work for you, you have to work the organization.

What is your strategy?  Why you are networking?  Are you prospecting, looking for people to buy your products or services?  For instance, if your clients are dentist and you want to find more dentist, then most likely you are not going to find them at a chamber event.  You will need to do some research to find your target market!

Are you looking for referral sources,  other professionals who work with Dentist?   Who are these  professionals  and where do they hang out?    When you find the 6-8 people who work with the same client type that you do in a non-competitive way, your networking becomes far more effective,  more strategic.

When you have the people who can help you build your business you can then network for them.  Go to events as a team and work the room for each other instead of yourself.   Maybe it is not that you need to network more, but you need to network more effectively.  It is more about you and your strategy than it is about the organization you are joining.

Hazel M Walker, owns three award winning franchise’s. She is a 10 year owner of two BNI Franchises where she teaches members how to leverage their time and network to build each others businesses. She is also a Referral Institute franchise owner and teaches Business Owners how to harness the Science of Referrals to develop Referrals for Life. Hazel is a published author in New York Times best sellers Masters of Networking and Masters of Sales. As a member of the National Speakers Association she travels the world speaking to businesses and women’s organizations on the topics of networking to create a life you love.

There is no place where it is more important to show gratitude than in your referral marketing activities. Letting people know that you appreciate what they have done for you makes it easier for that person to refer you again.

I find that women are so much better at thanking others for helping them than men are. Why is that? A hand written note or a small token of appreciation, hands down women are most effective at showing appreciation.

So, the rest of this article is for the men. Say thank you to the people who refer you, thank those who connect you to the people you want to be connected to. Systems like Sendoutcards make it easy for you say thanks. You can create a card, add a little gift if you want and send it out, all online. It takes all of 10 minutes, but the return is 10 fold. If you don’t want to use Sendoutcards come up with a system of your own, make it a habit.

People want to be thanked, people want to be appreciated, when you take the time to let people know how much you appreciate them, you will win over and over again.

Hazel M Walker, owns three award winning franchise’s. She is a 10 year owner of two BNI Franchises where she teaches members how to leverage their time and network to build each others businesses. She is also a Referral Institute franchise owner and teaches Business Owners how to harness the Science of Referrals to develop Referrals for Life. Hazel is a published author in New York Times best sellers Masters of Networking and Masters of Sales. As a member of the National Speakers Association she travels the world speaking to businesses and women’s organizations on the topics of networking to create a life you love.

Going out for a drink with friends, playing golf, and hanging out at a cookout are all ways that we build relationships. It is the social aspects of our relationships that make for strong business relationships too. It is those times when I get to know someone personally that makes me want to help them achieve their goals. While we may not be fast friends we have developed a deeper relationship and it is that relationship that builds trust and a desire to help. Building my network effectively is very important to me, adding the right people, building relationships with them requires that I stay in communication with them.

One of the things that I love about Twitter is my ability to have communication with local tweeters, to meet them face to face at tweet-ups in a casual manner. Because we have spent so much time getting to know each other on twitter it is as if we have already met, we start the relationship much further along than if I had just met them. I already know what they are interested in by the tweets they post and the links the tweet. I learn about their business when they tweet and list their blogs and I build credibility with my followers when I take the time to post good material on my blog, when I post good tweets. I give to my network of tweeters by recommending them and retweeting their tweets. When we finally do meet at a tweet-up we already know each other.

If you are tweeting take a little time to set up groups of local people who are tweeting. They are most likely people you are going to have the opportunity to meet and build networking relationships with. For me, Tweetdeck has been a great tool for sorting my tweeters and creating groups that I can interact with, create relationships with and add to my network.

Hazel M Walker, owns three award winning franchise’s. She is a 10 year owner of two BNI Franchises where she teaches members how to leverage their time and network to build each others businesses. She is also a Referral Institute franchise owner and teaches Business Owners how to harness the Science of Referrals to develop Referrals for Life. Hazel is a published author in New York Times best sellers Masters of Networking and Masters of Sales. As a member of the National Speakers Association she travels the world speaking to businesses and women’s organizations on the topics of networking to create a life you love.

Business people spend a lot of time networking, some times it is important to slow down and develop relationships with the people that you have added to your network.  In the book “The 29% Solution” by Dr. Ivan R Misner and Michelle Donovan, they discuss tactics for building better relationships with your network members.  The more we get to know our network members the more credibility we build with them.

Hazel M Walker, owns three award winning franchise’s. She is a 10 year owner of two BNI Franchises where she teaches members how to leverage their time and network to build each others businesses. She is also a Referral Institute franchise owner and teaches Business Owners how to harness the Science of Referrals to develop Referrals for Life. Hazel is a published author in New York Times best sellers Masters of Networking and Masters of Sales. As a member of the National Speakers Association she travels the world speaking to businesses and women’s organizations on the topics of networking to create a life you love.