A few years ago, I separated from my husband of close to 10 years. It’s not something that just happened over night but was a build up of 18 months of continuous arguing and just going nowhere. After months of anger and hatred I had an eye opening thought that I wanted my husband back. Most likely you’ve found this site because you too are ready to save your marriage. I want to share some of the hills I had to overcome and where you can find some great information to assist you during the reconciliation.

If you are ready to save your marriage then there is a few things you need to know. If you and your spouse are separated and still not sure whether it is divorce or reconciliation in your future, then the information I am going to explain is just for you.  Either one or both of you have tried dating other people but you realize that no one can compare to your ex and you are now ready to save your marriage. You have decided that you will get back with your ex, no matter what it takes, and give the relationship one last shot. But now you want some help to save your marriage and could use some moral support from your friends as well.

Be prepared that while you were going through the separation, you may have said some things you wish you could take back. Most likely you confided in your friends during that time. I know during my separation, I had several friends that listened and supported me while others must have been living out their own marital aggressions through me. Before you start the reconciliation process, you need to come clean with your friends and tell them you are ready to save your marriage. Let them know how much you appreciated their support (even the ones that were ready to run your spouse over for you), but that there is only one person for you and that their continued support is needed.

It’s only right that they understand the anger you were feeling and do whatever it takes to help you get back with your spouse. Yeah, right! They will throw a fit and ask think that you have completely lost your mind! But they are your friends and if they are good ones, they will come through in the end. I can attest to that. The friends that stood by me are still in my life years later, and our friendship is even stronger, while the ones that added fuel to the fire really aren’t in my life any longer. It truly is better that way.

Now I need you to ask yourself one serious question; “Why are you now ready to save your marriage”. Do you still love your soon to be ex or is it that you just don’t not want to be alone?  Maybe the dating scene hasn’t been going too well. It’s important that you realize the why the separation occurred in the first place. Was it during a heated argument or maybe you simply could not tolerate a nasty habit? Bad habits don’t just vanish when you break up. We don’t want a repeat of the same situation. If you are seriously ready to save your marriage then you need to remember the reason you fell in love with your spouse and the real reason the separation happened in the first place. You also need to be prepared to forgive anything that has occurred not only during the marriage but also during the separation. That is truly the only way you can move forward. If you get in a small argument when you are back together, you cannot say, “well remember when you…”.

If you’ve talked to your spouse and have now decided that you are both ready to save your marriage then it’s important to discuss the issues, talk about the things that bother each of you and get everything out in the open so you can move forward. Really nothing has changed. You are both the same person and the problems have not disappeared.  Don’t rush in. Take it slow. Talk about things before they escalate into a situation that is out of control. If you’re reading this then it’s time to take the step and really get started and save your marriage. I am so happy that I was able to work through my problems and will be happily celebrating my 14 year anniversary this year. Not to mention, we also had another child since then and are closer now then ever. Here is some useful tips when you are ready to save your marriage.