When I first went into business for myself, I was confident that I had the marketing tactics my clients needed. I was also confident that I would learn to be a strategic advisor. What I didn’t realize was that I did not have confidence that I would be able to run my own business. The biggest challenge is that I didn’t even know it!
Nonetheless, I pounded the pavement and successfully landed several clients within just a few months. I was pleased with my progress, but couldn’t help but notice that at every networking event I attended, I was hit on by men. I even had several male clients who were hitting on me while we worked together. I was alarmed: I wanted to be taken seriously … as a serious professional! I immediately decided that I didn’t look “serious” or “professional” enough.
I made a list – How to look more professional:
- Buy some fake eyeglasses
- Learn how to style a classy chignon
- Buy some business suits that made me look frumpy
Needless to say, the above list did not actually solve my problem. Instead, I realized that the trouble was not in how I dressed on the outside, but how I felt about myself on the inside. As a business owner and a professional, I was not confident, and my clients and prospects (and the men at networking events) could sense my vulnerability.
In fact, I learned that most people in business will admit that their greatest fear is that they will be exposed for not being as smart/professional/sophisticated as other people think they are. This comes not from the fact that we are not smart/professional/sophisticated, but that we don’t believe that we are.
Thus, I created a new list – How to build confidence in my professional abilities:
- Keep a list of all of my professional successes – big and small
- Keep a list documenting anytime someone says something positive about my professional abilities
- Before any event or meeting at which I will meet clients or prospects, review the above lists and remember that I am in fact smart/professional/sophisticated
- Do my homework before meetings and events so that I know who will be there and what is important to them so that I can speak confidently about those subjects
It worked! I stopped getting hit upon at every networking event, and discovered that I can do more to impact how people perceive me by tweaking my inside than I can by tweaking the outside.
Of course, I must admit …when an optometrist found that I had a very slight vision problem, I still jumped at the opportunity to get glasses
Virginia Ginsburg is an entrepreneur and business & marketing consultant who delivers strategic, affordable marketing services through her company
accordionmarketing. She also writes a blog called
Body > Mind > Business, which discuses the connection between business health and personal health, and the struggles she faces in pursuit of work-life balance.
Virginia has an MBA from the University of Southern California and is currently (slowly) pursuing a Ph.D. in Psychology at UCLA. She has more than 12 years of experience as a senior marketing consultant, and has served as a trusted partner, coach and consultant to more than 100 sole proprietors, partnerships and corporations.
Virginia lives in Santa Monica, CA with her husband and daughter. As part of her passion for working with entrepreneurs, Virginia is actively involved in small business development projects in the U.S. and in developing countries.